Rosanne tackles the stigma around asking for help on the fertility journey, revealing how pride, fear, and perfectionism keep women stuck in cycles of struggle. She shares her own transformation from control freak who refused help to someone who understood that visionaries need support to manifest their dreams.
Rosanne opens by addressing the bizarre folklore that asking for help shows weakness, particularly common among alpha females and high achievers. She shares her own resistance to vulnerability and how it nearly cost her fertility success.
Many women allow themselves only tiny amounts of help before cutting it off, creating cycles of one step forward, two steps back. Others wait until they're desperate, which actually repels the outcomes they want.
The masculine energy and tools that drive career success can actually hinder fertility success. Rosanne explains how her prosecutor skills kept her stuck until she learned to embrace different approaches.
Using Elon Musk as an example, Rosanne illustrates how all visionaries assemble expert teams to manifest their dreams. Fertility dreams deserve the same level of strategic support and shouldn't be treated as side projects.
“As an alpha female, I do my shit. People can count on me. I'm the person everyone comes to for strength and and certainty and consistency. The idea of appearing weak was just completely unfathomable to me.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 3:37
Alpha females and high achievers often resist asking for help due to beliefs that it shows weakness. They're used to being the person everyone comes to for strength and consistency, making the idea of appearing vulnerable completely unfathomable.
“I would argue that if you allow yourself to consciously get to the point of desperation, you've already lost. Think about the shit show you create in your life when you are desperate.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 7:13
Waiting until desperate means you've already lost because desperation creates a shit show in your life that doesn't attract the beautiful baby you want. Desperation is not a state that brings goodness into your life.
“The tools that made me an assassin in the courtroom were actually keeping me stuck on this journey. It's insane that we think that what's what drives our ambition in the work world is necessarily going to give us the peace and confidence we desire on this journey.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 13:34
The tools that make you successful in your career can actually keep you stuck on your fertility journey. Achieving professional success uses one set of muscles, while fertility success requires different ones - sometimes your strengths become weaknesses when trying to conceive.
“I could not fix my situation from the mindset that created the fucking mess that was in my life. Are you getting what I'm saying? The subconscious mind is insidious.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 14:48
You cannot fix your fertility situation from the mindset that created the mess because the subconscious mind is insidious. Even smart, educated women find themselves waking up to the same old results until they interrupt the pattern by asking for help.
“Is one thing to be determined, but it's another thing to be desperate, and the latter is not you and your power.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 8:24
Determination keeps you in your power while desperation removes you from it. Desperation creates chaos and doesn't attract the outcomes you want, whereas determination maintains clarity and purposeful action toward your fertility goals.
A three-step exercise to identify where you're holding back from getting help and why
Identify where you're holding back
Be honest about where you know you're refusing to ask for help - whether it's mindset, treatment, partner issues, or family drama
Examine why you're refusing help
Sit with the emotions driving your resistance: pride, jealousy, fear, shame, or some combination. Recognize these states don't bring babies or miracles
Make the decision to ask for help
If you're smart, recognize those emotions won't bring your baby. If you're even smarter, decide today to ask for help where you know you need it
Women who succeed on their fertility journey ask for help, while those who struggle often refuse it due to misguided beliefs about weakness
Rosanne conceived naturally at 43 after years of treatment failure once she stopped relying solely on her masculine energy and asked for mindset support. Every woman interviewed on her podcast had the courage to ask for help.
Alpha females and high achievers create unique hell for themselves on fertility journeys because professional success muscles don't translate to fertility success
Rosanne's tools that made her an assassin in the courtroom as a sexual assault prosecutor actually kept her stuck on her fertility journey for years. Type A women are used to slaying it in every aspect of life but struggle uniquely with fertility.
Some women self-sabotage by only allowing themselves tiny amounts of help, then cutting it off when they start feeling better
Women will take one step forward then two steps back with mindset work, diet, and treatments. Just when they start getting the hang of things and feeling great, they let off the gas and find themselves spinning again.
Waiting until you're desperate to ask for help means you've already lost because desperation doesn't attract babies
Rosanne interviewed a woman who said she wouldn't make the investment in help until she was more desperate. When you're desperate, you create a shit show in your life that doesn't align with bringing a beautiful baby into your world.
You cannot fix your fertility situation from the same mindset that created the mess in your life
Rosanne told herself she was smart and educated and could figure it out, then went back to sleep and woke up to the same old results. The subconscious mind is insidious and keeps women stuck in cycles until they interrupt the pattern.
Visionaries like Elon Musk bring on the best experts to manifest their vision, and fertility dreams require the same approach
Elon Musk didn't do Tesla, The Boring Company, or SpaceX alone - he brought on the best in the world to help him bring his vision to fruition. Having a baby isn't a side hustle but a calling that deserves expert support.
Women who succeed on their fertility journey ask for help, while those who struggle often refuse it due to misguided beliefs about weakness
▶ 1:03Alpha females and high achievers create unique hell for themselves on fertility journeys because professional success muscles don't translate to fertility success
▶ 13:34Some women self-sabotage by only allowing themselves tiny amounts of help, then cutting it off when they start feeling better
▶ 4:58Waiting until you're desperate to ask for help means you've already lost because desperation doesn't attract babies
▶ 7:02You cannot fix your fertility situation from the same mindset that created the mess in your life
▶ 14:48Visionaries like Elon Musk bring on the best experts to manifest their vision, and fertility dreams require the same approach
▶ 10:38“Asking for help on your fertility journey is a sign of weakness”
CONSIDER: Asking for help shows love and commitment to your mission and is what successful women do
“Professional success skills will automatically make you successful at getting pregnant”
CONSIDER: Achieving professional success uses different muscles than fertility success, and your strengths may actually be your weaknesses when trying to conceive
“Women who succeed ask for help.”
“Asking for help is not weakness, and it doesn't mean that there's gonna be the sudden unraveling of your psyche and your whole life is gonna go to shit because you asked for help. It's quite the opposite.”
“Having a baby isn't just some side hustle for you. It's a fucking calling.”
“Visionaries need help to make what they know in their hearts manifest in the material world.”
“I could not fix my situation from the mindset that created the fucking mess that was in my life.”
“DIY is a lie. Nine times out of ten, it ends up costing you way more to dick around.”
EP 365: The New Rules of Fertility #1: Initiation
The rules of fertility success are changing, and wise women are no longer tolerating masculine limitation-based approaches in what is inherently a feminine process.
EP213 IVF Didn’t Work Till She Did This: Marina’s Story
After 9 IVF cycles and 15 embryo transfers across multiple countries, Marina discovered the one thing that finally made the difference.
EP125 When Dr. Caroline Stopped Living In Fear, She Manifested TWO Miracles
A physician in residency was told her egg quality was terrible at 34, but when she stopped living in fear and started living fearlessly fertile, she manifested not one but TWO miracles.
Frameworks & Methods
Common Beliefs
The old rules of fertility are rooted in a masculine paradigm of limitation that focuses on what can't be done rather than possibility
Rosanne has coached women for 12+ years across six continents, observing that traditional fertility approaches emphasize statistics, age limitations, and failure histories rather than individual potential and heart-based knowing.
The new rules of fertility respect the mind-body connection and reject the lie that stress has nothing to do with fertility
Over 364 previous podcast episodes feature stories of women who beat fertility odds through mindset work, including women who conceived naturally after years of treatment failure by believing bigger than medical limitations.
There's no arbitrary number that says when to quit fertility treatment - the question is how bad do you want what you say you want
Marina did 9 IVF cycles with 15 embryo transfers over 5 years before conceiving her baby boy, proving that persistence with the right mindset can overcome seemingly impossible odds.
You are the common denominator in all of your fertility experiences - changing clinics, countries, and protocols won't work if you don't change yourself
Marina changed clinics multiple times and traveled from Italy to Brazil but didn't get pregnant until she addressed her mindset, conceiving within 4 months of mindset work after 5 years of treatment failure.
