Rosanne teaches a simple but powerful tool for navigating holiday stress during your fertility journey: making peace your priority. She shares how to evaluate every holiday decision through the lens of what brings you peace, setting boundaries with family and social obligations.
Rosanne opens by acknowledging how holiday season can compound fertility journey stress, with failed treatments and disappointments from the year creating a 'dog pile' effect. She reflects on her own journey of isolation and bitterness, recognizing that women on fertility journeys need different care than their usual needs.
The core teaching introduces a simple statement of fact: 'Peace is my priority.' This becomes the lens through which to evaluate every holiday decision, from family gatherings to social obligations. Rosanne emphasizes this is particularly important for professional caregiving women who constantly give to others.
Rosanne clarifies that peace doesn't mean avoiding effort, but having deep conviction that your choice is right for you. Whether that means spending time with family or checking into the Ritz Carlton alone, the key is alignment with your authentic desires rather than obligation.
She challenges the notion that family guilt is unavoidable, teaching that 'people treat us the way we train them to.' Holiday stress patterns are often self-created and can be changed by adults willing to set new boundaries and live life on their own terms.
Rosanne connects making bold choices about peace to preparing for feminine leadership in motherhood. She encourages giving yourself permission to make mistakes and change your mind, emphasizing this builds the self-trust needed for the journey ahead.
“Peace is my priority. So that anything that comes your way is evaluated by you through the lens of peace is my priority.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 7:11
Make peace your priority. Before any holiday decision, ask yourself 'if peace was my priority, what would I do?' This simple lens helps you evaluate every invitation and obligation based on what truly brings you peace.
“peace doesn't mean that there is no effort. What I'm talking about when I say peace is a deep and abiding conviction within you that this is the right thing for you”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 9:57
Peace means having a deep conviction that your choice is right for you, even if it requires effort or disappoints others. It's not about avoiding all work, but about making decisions that align with your genuine needs this season.
“people treat us the way we train them to. So if you find yourself in a bind right now feeling all kinds of shame and guilt, that's all stuff that you created.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 14:56
Recognize that people treat you the way you train them to. Holiday guilt is often something you've created through past patterns, and as an adult, you can choose to break free from these dynamics by setting new boundaries.
“what do I want this holiday season to be about for me? And just get really clear on what that is. It could be anything. It could be I need a vacation. It could be, I don't wanna talk to anybody.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 4:48
First ask yourself what you want this holiday season to be about for you. Whether you want solitude or social time, both are valid - the key is making decisions that truly bring you peace rather than acting from obligation or guilt.
“there's no better way to say, mama is up to bat and mama is ready for this role as feminine leader in her home and in her children's life, then by designating a time in her life where peace is the priority.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 13:34
Making bold choices about your peace demonstrates that you're ready for the feminine leadership role of motherhood. It shows you can make decisions based on your family's needs rather than outside pressure or guilt.
“give yourself permission to probably make a few mistakes and and make some choices that, maybe you might look back on and say, you know what? Maybe I could have done something else. But at the end of the day, it's your decision.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 15:27
Give yourself permission to make mistakes - that's how you learn and grow. As a woman, you have the right to change your mind and adjust your boundaries as you discover what truly serves you.
A simple framework for navigating holiday stress by making peace your priority
Define Your Holiday Vision
Ask yourself: 'What do I want this holiday season to be about for me?' Get clear on your genuine desires separate from family expectations, work obligations, or social pressure.
Adopt the Peace Priority Framework
Use the statement of fact 'Peace is my priority' as your lens for evaluating every holiday decision, invitation, and obligation that comes your way.
Apply the Peace Test
For each holiday choice, ask: 'If indeed peace was my priority, what would I do in this situation?' Look for deep conviction that your choice is right for you.
Release What Doesn't Serve
Unless something gives you genuine peace, let it go. This may mean skipping gatherings, changing traditions, or disappointing people who have expectations of you.
Give Yourself Grace
Allow yourself to make mistakes and change your mind. Use this as an opportunity to learn what truly serves you and build trust in your internal guidance system.
Holiday stress can compound fertility journey disappointments, making this season particularly challenging for women trying to conceive
Rosanne notes that stressors from earlier in the year - failed fertility treatments, clinic changes, disappointments - can 'culminate and dog pile on you' during the holidays when everyone has expectations.
Women on fertility journeys need different care than usual because their circumstances are unique and require special consideration
Rosanne reflects on her own journey: 'I never stopped to say, hey. This particular set of circumstances that I am living right now are kinda unique, and the needs that I typically get met are probably not enough for this season in my life.'
Peace should be your priority during the holidays - use this as a lens to evaluate every invitation, obligation, and decision
Rosanne teaches the simple statement of fact: 'Peace is my priority' and explains how to ask 'if indeed peace was my priority, what would I do in this situation?' for every holiday decision.
Professional women in caregiving roles are especially susceptible to over-giving during the holidays
Rosanne notes she works with 'women that are physicians, lawyers, teachers, nurses, engineers, caregivers... women who are constantly giving of themselves' who need special permission to prioritize peace.
True peace means deep conviction that your choice is right for you, even if it requires effort or disappoints others
Rosanne clarifies: 'peace doesn't mean that there is no effort... peace is a deep and abiding conviction within you that this is the right thing for you' - whether that's spending time with family or checking into the Ritz Carlton alone.
Making peace your priority builds spiritual prosperity and self-trust that extends beyond the holidays
Rosanne explains that prioritizing peace 'gives us the ability to trust ourselves' and builds 'incredible amount of trust' when you honor your inner guidance about wanting to be alone or socialize.
People treat us the way we train them to - holiday guilt and pressure is often self-created and can be changed
Rosanne states directly: 'people treat us the way we train them to. So if you find yourself in a bind right now feeling all kinds of shame and guilt, that's all stuff that you created.'
Give yourself permission to make mistakes and change your mind about holiday boundaries
Rosanne encourages: 'give yourself permission to probably make a few mistakes... That's how we get better. That's how we get to know ourselves better' and reminds that 'as women, we have the right to change our minds at all times.'
Making bold choices about your peace prepares you for the feminine leadership role of motherhood
Rosanne connects holiday boundaries to motherhood preparation: 'there's no better way to say, mama is up to bat and mama is ready for this role as feminine leader in her home and in her children's life, then by designating a time in her life where peace is the priority.'
Holiday stress can compound fertility journey disappointments, making this season particularly challenging for women trying to conceive
▶ 1:42Women on fertility journeys need different care than usual because their circumstances are unique and require special consideration
▶ 3:25Peace should be your priority during the holidays - use this as a lens to evaluate every invitation, obligation, and decision
▶ 7:11Professional women in caregiving roles are especially susceptible to over-giving during the holidays
▶ 8:23True peace means deep conviction that your choice is right for you, even if it requires effort or disappoints others
▶ 9:57Making peace your priority builds spiritual prosperity and self-trust that extends beyond the holidays
▶ 11:31People treat us the way we train them to - holiday guilt and pressure is often self-created and can be changed
▶ 14:56Give yourself permission to make mistakes and change your mind about holiday boundaries
▶ 15:27Making bold choices about your peace prepares you for the feminine leadership role of motherhood
▶ 13:34“You must attend all holiday gatherings and meet everyone's expectations to be a good family member”
CONSIDER: Peace is your priority - evaluate every holiday obligation through the lens of what brings you genuine peace
“Holiday stress and guilt from family is just something you have to endure”
CONSIDER: People treat us the way we train them to - you created the guilt patterns and can change them as an adult
“Peace is my priority.”
“people treat us the way we train them to. So if you find yourself in a bind right now feeling all kinds of shame and guilt, that's all stuff that you created.”
“at some point, we have to grow up, ladies. At some point, we have to grow up and live life on our terms.”
“there's no better way to say, mama is up to bat and mama is ready for this role as feminine leader in her home and in her children's life, then by designating a time in her life where peace is the priority.”
“Unless something gives you peace, let it go. Just let it go.”
“This particular set of circumstances that I am living right now are kinda unique, and the needs that I typically get met are probably not enough for this season in my life.”
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