Rosanne teaches why change feels so difficult and how to master the discomfort to get what you want on your fertility journey. She explains how our primitive brain keeps us trapped in comfortable patterns that don't serve us and provides a powerful reframe to make peace with discomfort.
Rosanne explains that change pushes us out of our comfort zone into uncertainty, triggering our primitive brain's fear response. This evolutionary wiring keeps us trapped in familiar patterns even when they're not working, because our brain interprets discomfort as danger and will create elaborate excuses to keep us safe.
Our brains become expert at justifying staying stuck with excuses like cost concerns, needing spousal permission, or worrying about others' opinions. Rosanne particularly calls out the belief that you need your partner's permission, emphasizing that you're a grown woman capable of making your own decisions.
The key to mastering change is expecting discomfort as the price of doing business and conditioning yourself to find pleasure in it. By asking 'Is staying in my comfort zone going to get me what I want?' you can break the cycle of staying stuck and start associating discomfort with progress toward your goals.
Even tiny changes can create massive results over time, like a pilot making minute trajectory adjustments that equal miles of course correction. Rosanne emphasizes getting comfortable with being uncomfortable and highlights the importance of coaching and mentorship to see beyond self-imposed limitations.
“It pushes us out of our comfort zone. It takes us out of the easy breezy, predictable state that we're normally in. It takes us into a place of uncertainty, and our brains hate that shit.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 2:54
Change is hard because it pushes us out of our comfort zone into uncertainty, and our primitive brain interprets this as danger. We're literally wired to stay comfortable even in situations that aren't serving us.
“The smartest thing you can do when it comes to change is make peace with the discomfort. Expect that discomfort is just the price of doing business.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 7:00
Make peace with discomfort and expect it as the price of doing business. Ask yourself: 'Is staying in my comfort zone going to get me what I want?' If it hasn't yet, chances are it won't.
“Our brains have become wildly adept at giving us a parade of excuses that justify us staying in the comfort zone even if it sucks.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 4:47
Common excuses include 'That's too expensive,' 'I have to talk to my husband first,' 'What would my friend say?' and 'It's too late for me.' These are engineered by our brain to keep us in the safe zone.
“You are a grown ass woman with a job. If you want something, sister, go get it. It's one thing to let your partner know that you are doing something. It's another to ask for their permission.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 5:17
No. You're a grown woman with a job—your partner is not your parent. There's a difference between letting your partner know what you're doing versus asking for permission.
“When you're on a flight and the pilot just makes a minute change in the trajectory of the plane, it can equal miles of changing course down the road.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 11:05
Even tiny changes can spell success down the road. Like a pilot making a minute change in trajectory that equals miles of course correction, small incremental changes compound over time on your fertility journey.
“We are literally wired to stay comfortable. As far as our brains are concerned, discomfort equals bad.”
— Rosanne Austin▶ 3:35
Your brain is wired to stay comfortable and predictable. Even when patterns aren't working, your lizard brain prefers familiar discomfort over the uncertainty of change because it interprets uncertainty as danger.
A framework for overcoming resistance to change and conditioning yourself for discomfort
Recognize the pattern
Get honest about how you approach change. Do you run from it? Do you make excuses to avoid it? Are there patterns you're repeating because you're afraid?
Ask the key question
Continuously ask yourself: 'Is staying in my comfort zone going to get me what I want?' Let this question be in your back pocket.
Expect discomfort
Make peace with discomfort and expect it as just the price of doing business when going for what you want.
Reframe the discomfort
Condition yourself to associate pleasure with discomfort by remembering that getting uncomfortable brings you one step closer to what you want.
Take action anyway
Stand up and ask for what you want even when it's not in sight, knowing your brain will tell you to run in the opposite direction.
Success on your fertility journey literally requires that you get good at change
Rosanne conceived naturally at 43 after years of fertility treatment failure by learning to get smart about change and breaking old patterns that kept her stuck.
Our lizard brain goes crazy when faced with changing circumstances because it specializes in scaring us to try to keep us safe
This primitive brain response causes people to go back into pain spirals when seeing pregnant women or getting baby shower invitations, even when they've committed to not letting negativity dominate their journey.
We are literally wired to stay comfortable, and as far as our brains are concerned, discomfort equals bad
This wiring keeps people trapped repeating old patterns just because they're comfortable even if they suck, like going back to old eating habits the day after committing to a diet.
Our brains have become wildly adept at giving us a parade of excuses that justify staying in the comfort zone even if it sucks
Common excuses include 'That's too expensive,' 'I have to talk to my husband first,' 'What would my friend say?' and 'It's too late for me'—all engineered to keep us within safe confines.
You are a grown ass woman with a job—if you want something, sister, go get it. Your partner is not your parent.
The excuse of needing to ask your husband first is total bullshit—it's one thing to let your partner know you're doing something, it's another to ask for permission.
The smartest thing you can do when it comes to change is make peace with the discomfort and expect that discomfort is just the price of doing business
By conditioning yourself to stand up and ask for what you want even when it's not in sight, you break the chain of mediocrity that your lizard brain threatens to keep you in.
Getting uncomfortable and making changes is most likely to bring you one step closer to what you want
If what you've been doing up to this point isn't getting you results, you're going to have to make a change, so why not look forward to it and get giddy about it.
Your thoughts fuel your actions, your actions lead to your results—this equation applies to everything including your fertility journey
This simple and predictable equation means if you want different results, you must do different things, and that by necessity equals change.
Some people will choose to stay in their comfort zone even if it costs them the life they truly want because the discomfort of change is too great
These people walk away from their dreams and watch others live them on the sidelines, often hiding behind excuses and blaming doctors, money, or someone who did them wrong instead of owning their choice.
Having a coach and getting mentorship to see beyond the confines of your comfort zone is critical for getting results faster and smarter
Rosanne credits her coaches and mentors for helping her see beyond the walls she built around herself, enabling her to become a bestselling author with clients worldwide and conceive her son Asher at 43.
Even the tiniest change you make today can spell success down the road, like a pilot making a minute change in trajectory that equals miles of changing course
Small incremental changes compound over time, which is why getting comfortable with discomfort is so critical for fertility success.
Success on your fertility journey literally requires that you get good at change
▶ 2:33Our lizard brain goes crazy when faced with changing circumstances because it specializes in scaring us to try to keep us safe
▶ 3:14We are literally wired to stay comfortable, and as far as our brains are concerned, discomfort equals bad
▶ 3:35Our brains have become wildly adept at giving us a parade of excuses that justify staying in the comfort zone even if it sucks
▶ 4:47You are a grown ass woman with a job—if you want something, sister, go get it. Your partner is not your parent.
▶ 5:17The smartest thing you can do when it comes to change is make peace with the discomfort and expect that discomfort is just the price of doing business
▶ 7:00Getting uncomfortable and making changes is most likely to bring you one step closer to what you want
▶ 8:01Your thoughts fuel your actions, your actions lead to your results—this equation applies to everything including your fertility journey
▶ 9:02Some people will choose to stay in their comfort zone even if it costs them the life they truly want because the discomfort of change is too great
▶ 9:23Having a coach and getting mentorship to see beyond the confines of your comfort zone is critical for getting results faster and smarter
▶ 10:14Even the tiniest change you make today can spell success down the road, like a pilot making a minute change in trajectory that equals miles of changing course
▶ 11:05Scroll for more
“Discomfort means something is wrong and you should avoid it”
CONSIDER: Discomfort is just the price of doing business when going for what you want—you can actually discover pleasure in it
“You need your partner's permission before making decisions about your fertility journey”
CONSIDER: You are a grown woman who can make her own decisions—your partner is not your parent
“Success on this journey literally requires that you get good at change.”
“You are a grown ass woman with a job. If you want something, sister, go get it.”
“Is staying in my comfort zone going to get me what I want?”
“Get comfortable with being uncomfortable, baby.”
“We are literally wired to stay comfortable. As far as our brains are concerned, discomfort equals bad.”
“Your thoughts fuel your actions. Your actions lead to your results.”
EP201 Are You Really Ready? The Dream v. Being Ready to Receive It.
Are you just dreaming about your baby, or are you actually ready to receive them?
EP 365: The New Rules of Fertility #1: Initiation
The rules of fertility success are changing, and wise women are no longer tolerating masculine limitation-based approaches in what is inherently a feminine process.
EP343: Do You Really Want This Baby? How to Tell If You Want This Baby Bad Enough to WIN
Are you doing all the fertility treatments but mentally checked out—and wondering why you're not getting results?
Frameworks & Methods
Common Beliefs
There's a fundamental difference between wanting a baby from lack versus being ready to receive one - wanting comes from what isn't here, while readiness focuses on preparing for what's to come
Rosanne observed this shift in all successful clients featured on her podcast over 200+ episodes, noting when 'the switch flips' from chasing energy to confident readiness
Being ready to receive has an innate emotional maturity, confidence, peace and calm that is decidedly different from the desperate energy of 'when is my baby gonna get here?'
Rosanne describes recognizing this shift in all women who achieved success on her podcast, noting it's 'truly a beautiful thing' to observe when the transformation happens
The old rules of fertility are rooted in a masculine paradigm of limitation that focuses on what can't be done rather than possibility
Rosanne has coached women for 12+ years across six continents, observing that traditional fertility approaches emphasize statistics, age limitations, and failure histories rather than individual potential and heart-based knowing.
The new rules of fertility respect the mind-body connection and reject the lie that stress has nothing to do with fertility
Over 364 previous podcast episodes feature stories of women who beat fertility odds through mindset work, including women who conceived naturally after years of treatment failure by believing bigger than medical limitations.
